Pantry which made people to remove their pants

    Before you could think anything dirty about ‘removing the pants’, wipe any semblance of it. This has nothing to do with that kind of “removing the pants’.

   Travelling by train has always been by favorite way of commuting. But eating from the pantry while travelling, a big no no. Me and my friends were on a trip to Kerala for attending one of my friend’s brother’s wedding. When we left for Kerala we had our dinner in the comfort of our home because it was a 10pm train. Little did we know about ‘The Railway Pantry’ apart from that ‘Anniyan’ Ambi (Aparichit in Hindi) refused to eat because the Rasam was watery, Papad was like kerchief and Sambar was directly disproportional to the amount of rice.

   A day in the boat house in Alapuzha, attending the marriage, 3 days of good food and the act of emptying the pockets of our beloved hosts, we had a lot of fun. We had a train to board that evening . Hence we had to have dinner in the train at the mercy of ‘The Railway Pantry’.

   Like the Lamb that is waiting to be beheaded in front of Lord Kali we called up the pantry guy. My friend Ravi as asked the pantry guy for the menu.

Ravi: Sir! what do you have for dinner?

Pantry Guy:  Dosa, chapatti, Veg rice, Egg rice, chicken chapatti…..

Me: Look guys, we know the veg rice is filled with rice bullets and with no veggies. The dosa, one need not say anything about how lousy it would be.

Ravi:  Zip it Venky , chapatti is the only thing left, we shall have veg chapatti and non veg guys can have chicken chapatti. Give me X veg chapattis and Y chicken chapattis please

Pantry Guy: We will give the order in 30 minutes

Me: (said to myself) Never in my life i dreamed  whether a chapatti was veg or non-veg.

 

   30 minutes passed by and the guy came in with the food packets. There were 2 chapattis and a yellow color potato mash in the “veg chappati” and non-veg one contained a chicken piece. This took him 30 minutes? One bite and the non-veg guys threw their chicken pieces out of the train . We somehow managed to eat one chappati just to fill our growling stomach.

   After sometime everyone gave their own reason and went into the toilet in the train removed their pants and you know what they did? . The toilet didn't have a mug and this made their job much tougher. That is where the mineral water bottles came to rescue! They were used to fetch water. Me and another friend of mine Ashwath steered clear of “Mango juice”. Me thanks to my immunity and him because he didn't let the fucking chapatti fuck his stomach.  This wasn’t first time we had mango juice. Yes, “Mango juice” is what we call loose motion.

This was how the comedy cops took their revenge. You can see this Facebook album of mine and see the comedy cops doing their stuff here

   Way back when we were studying 11th class, a mean guy mixed some loose motion pills in Ice cream. We stupidly accepted that offer from him and paid the price. We all went to the toilet in the school without each other’s knowledge and the next day we found out that we all were Tataanked (In our lingo it means ‘being screwed’ or “befuddled”) and had a good laugh.That is where the name came ‘Mango Juice’ came from.

   The point of this whole incident being blogged is to let people throughout know how the Largest Network Of Railway is being run. Ours being the largest network makes the job tougher, but that does not mean it is something impossible. The Food and amenities provided by the Railways are pathetic. A part of the blame should also go to us. Many people dont care to flush the toilets they use or throw the wastes in the dust bin. No wonder railways stations are highly polluted. Let us do our bit to help the authorities by not urinating and littering at the stations and hope they will do their job.

Before I go I would like to share this blog I found through Indivine. It is called Tooned life. The blog contains cartoons on various topics from Facebook to Shoaib and Sania marriage, do check this out.